I'm often asked why I choose to make such bizarro music instead of "nice" songs. "Nice" being used to describe anything that isn't "I Have A Penis" or "Friggidy Ding-Dong". Truth is, I have made "nice" songs before and I plan to do so again someday. So today we'll take a look at six songs that have helped inspire me one way or another. You can listen to them as you read, thanks to the nice people at YouTube.
Prince - Kiss
Right, so this is the only song on this list that doesn't have a video to go with it because Prince doesn't like having his stuff on YouTube, and I really don't wanna get sued by the purple one himself. But if you look around Google I'm sure you can hear this song.
When "Kiss" came out I was about six years old and my sister had the 45. For my younger readers, a 45 is a vinyl single... you know, the ones with the big holes in the middle. Anyway, I used to steal my sister's records all the time and "Kiss" was no exception. I knew Prince was a boy because I'd seen Purple Rain already (that'll fuck you up at 5 years old...), so when I put the record on I was confused by this high-pitched falsetto voice. My first instinct was to change the speed of the record player. Well, that only sounded weirder. The lesson was learned: boys can sing in high-pitches and still manage to sleep with Carmen Electra.
Aerosmith - One Way Street
I became obsessed with Aerosmith in 1997, thanks to the album "Nine Lives". I spent every spare dime I had on collecting their back catalogue on vinyl (cause you could get them for about a buck a piece at flea markets). On their first album, simply titled "Aerosmith", they had a long jammed-out song called "One Way Street" (apparently heavily influenced by the Rolling Stones) and it was heavy on the harmonica. I'd heard lots of blues harp in Aero-songs already, and had started trying to play it myself, but this particular song really pushed me to learn more about the instrument. Much of my foundation for harmonica playing comes from listening to Steven Tyler. And since I learned to play by ear, I actually play mine upside-down and backwards. Oh well, seems to work just fine for me.
He-Man & She-Ra - I Have The Power
I have this neat record from the 80s that is an adaption of "He-Man & She-Ra: The Secret of the Sword". It's the story on record for home pleasure. Remember, in the 80s VHS tapes were pretty expensive to produce and buy through retailers. I can remember "Ghostbusters" retailing for over $80 in the 80s. These records were the next best thing.
But the point of it all is that this song was actually my first experience to a duet. Examined elsewhere on this website is the strange brother/sister relationship between He-Man and She-Ra, and this song is just further evidence. The lyrics are almost creepy as they talk about love and companionship. It's the kind of thing a psychology student could write a thesis on. Mind you, I've never recorded a duet, possibly because this perfect one already exists.
Run DMC (feat. Aerosmith) - Walk This Way
I've told this story before. I'm sure you've heard it.
I was watching Much Music with my older sister and the video for "Walk This Way" came on. Steven Tyler breaks through the wall and screams "waaaaaaaaaaaaaaalk this waaaaaaaaaaay" and instantly I thought, "That is the coolest person on the planet". The rest is history. Or is it?
For years after I thought Steven Tyler was in Run DMC. I had no idea what an Aerosmith was. It wasn't until "Cryin'" came out in the summer of '93 that I paid any attention to Aerosmith again. I put two-and-two together when I heard the original of "Walk This Way" on the radio. And thus began my obsession and journey into idol worshipping.
Bruce McCulloch - The Daves I Know
This song first appeared on the Kids In The Hall show, but you can find it on Bruce's album "Shame Based Man". That whole album is what made me want to start doing comedy music instead of "nice" songs. It's a simple song, a funny song, and a catchy song. Hmmm.... kinda like "I Have A Penis"?
The Kids In The Hall have been a big influence on me creatively. I became a fan of theirs in the early 90s when the CBC would show an hour of them every Friday night. If not for them, I wouldn't think it was okay for a man to wear a dress in public.
Hulk Hogan & The Wrestling Boot Band - Hulkster In Heaven
You simply MUST listen to this song.
The Hulkster had an album released when he was in WCW. There are some classic(?) tracks on it, some gems(?), and some moments of true musicianship(?).
"Hulkster In Heaven" is a song Hulk wrote for a boy who died in the hospital. I think he died from cancer, but it's also possible he died from too much training, too many prayers, and far too many vitamins...
Anyway, Hulk tells the boy through song that someday they'll tag up again when the Hulkster comes to heaven. It'll bring a tear to your eye. And if this emotional song doesn't get you all choked up inside, then you just aren't a good human being. C'mon, the Hulkster is baring his feelings for us all to hear. If only Hulk Hogan could've cured cancer... or whatever it was the boy died from.
And tha'ts a wrap! This was just a sample of some of the songs that changed my life. There are more, to be sure, so maybe I'll do a "Part Two" at some point in the future. After all, I didn't include GnR's "I Used To Love Her" or "We Can't Canoe As Friends Anymore" by Chris Morris. I guess all of that will just have to wait.
