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  Holy crap... Is that Vigo from Ghostbusters II? |
November 26, 2006 You might think that since I don't like watching TV it might be odd for me to buy a new TV Stand. Well, you're partially right. I don't like much of what's on TV these days, but I do like movies. The director's cut of Superman II comes out this Tuesday and there'll be a huge article about it on this site. I was due for a new TV stand anyway, and I wanted something a little nicer than the black one I've had for the last ten years or so. But on to the real story at hand... Road trip! I fucking love a good road trip. Johnny called me up the other night to see if I wanted to go to Ottawa with him to buy a new microphone. So I woke up nice and early on Saturday morning to burn a mixed CD for the road, then I woke up Dana, and we were off! Road trips are the perfect time for mixed CDs and all I can say is this was possibly the greatest mixed CD ever created with the intent of driving. We only made one stop on the way to Ottawa, and that was in some backwater town. Dana had to pee and she did so in their McDonalds. That was really fitting because she was wearing a "Big Mac Attack" T-Shirt. We didn't buy anything. Nobody needed gut-rot while in a city that wasn't home. So the lesson here is that McDonalds washrooms aren't just for customers only.     The (Centre) Rideau Center is full of good shopping times, and attractive girls in short skirts. I was hoping to find a Snakes On A Plane T-Shirt for sale, but sadly I was defeated. I'll get one sooner or later. It's my destiny. We grabbed some grub in the food court and I was the only one who seemed to enjoy my meal. Even though eating roast beef with a plastic fork and knife set seems just as akward as it is. We left the (Centre) Ridea Center for Steve's Music Shop, which is where Johnny had ordered the new mic. We spent a great deal of time in the shop, sampling some guitars, amps, cowbells, and maracas. There were a lot of french people in that store, which for some strange reason prompted me to refer to myself and comrades as "anglophones" for the next hour or so. Outside of the music store, and on the way to a record shop called Vertigo Records, Dana got an itch on her back so bad that it required the sheer raw magnitude of my right hand to salvage the impending itch of doom. Then Johnny gave a homeless man some change. I opted out of that situation as Dana stared with a dropped jaw at the "Ottawa Church of Scientology" across the street. Outside of an LCBO we grabbed some street meat, seeing as how nobody was satisfied with their lunch at the mall. The Hot Dog Man was awesome. He smelled just bad enough to be cooking food for me and it took him nearly 15 minutes to do the Veggie Dog for the dude in front of me. Seriously, I ordered, ate, and pooped it out before the dude got his veggie-dog. The veggie dude and his (I'm assuming) girlfriend were pretty cool. She was much cooler cause she eats meat and he doesn't, but oh well, go ahead and hit me for saying that. A block further on our walk we took a hard right and visited the downtown market where I bumped into long-time Ryan-Fan Sean Orlicky. My day was already great enough, and seeing that dude's mug made it even better. I'm so proud of him for growing his hair long, and I was vocal about telling him never to cut it. Not even for a woman. We made a point of visiting a store to check out their selection of Converse All Stars, then I bought some truffles from a local chocolatier, while Dana got a candy apple. Johnny chose to have no sweets at this time. We returned to the (Centre) Ridea Center to get the truck, then headed home while listening to the Rocky III Soundtrack.  While we were in the city, Johnny and I created two new words for the english language. Here they are for you to study and use: Skeetza - (adjective) A combination of the words "Skeet skeet" and "Huzzah", you can use this word to express happiness or joy, such as saying "Right On" or "Awesome". Mo-Ho - (Noun) A homosexual who hasn't yet realized that he/she is in fact a homosexual. When we got home Dana ate her Candy Apple and I reflected upon that great city, and how I can't wait to visit again. Next time, we Road Trip to Ottawa it'll be in the other part of downtown... where there's more toy stores and record stores. |
